Shaken brains change thinking and speaking

Winding down from the day and trying to catch up on some things as I wait for sleep to capture me.  Sure beats lounging in the dark and writing blog posts in my mind while I wait to wake in the morning.

I drank a Pepsi today.  I couldn't take a nap.  So now, I have caffeine coursing through my system.  Fortunately, tomorrow I have my hubby to cover for me if I need a nap so I can go back to my non-Pepsi state. 

One of my first goals when returning from Colorado was to kick the Pepsi.  This past week I did it, but then I had a couple since then.  But the caffeine headaches are gone.  At least I think they were caffeine headaches.  I did really well in Colorado.  Really reduced the pop intake because I didn't want to struggle with dehydration in Colorado. 

Since my return from Colorado, I have had a lot more trouble with my speech.  I saw the doctor before I left and was referred to a neuro doc. I just never have been back to my old self since the car accident.  Headaches, dizziness, numbness.  My doctor started calling neuro docs and we were referred to a Neuropsychiatrist to assess me and my symptoms.  I have more dramatic pauses to my speech and stuttering.  I have to work for words and the more I think the more pronounced (pun intended) the speech issues get.   Yes I meant to say the more I think.  Thinking is hard exercise these days for this brain.  It gets all fuzzy feeling and sometimes I think I feel it sweating a bit.   

When all is calm and quiet, it is as if the accident never happened.  Then I get busy around the house and talking to someone and it all changes.  The more animated or tired I am, well I try to find a sense of humor.  The word "who" gets me and, well, I pause and just "whoooo"t like an owl when I am with the kids.  Laughing is better than crying.  One of my clever witted children asked why I sounded like Porky the Pig.  To which he got a look and no response.  Of all things to compare the mother to, not the best choice. 

My brain gets tired.  I am told, that is, because it is trying to heal.  There is some talk about permanent brain damage in the speech area.  Surrounding parts of the brain may kick in to pick up the slack. 

The whole thing is just a confusing mess of whats??? The timing of the concussion with stress, cold/flu viruses, sinus stuff has really muddied the waters. I have such a high tolerance for sinus and ear pain it has been hard to know if dizziness is related to sickness or concussion. So I just kept resting. But I was pressed to seek a doctor appointment when faced with the question of whether to fly or not this past trip to Colorado. There will be more testing coming up.  Primarily for a baseline to monitor my brain's healing and for the future.  It should, also, (I am hoping it will) give us some indicators as to what is going on with me and my brain. With my mom's early onset of Alzheimer's it will be good record to have for my own medical history. 

For now, I wait...wait for appointments and rest.  I need to have moderate stress and activity in my life to allow my brain to heal. The first 3 months are critical... well the first 2 months are done and gone. There was nothing we could have or probably would have done differently had we known...we were doing the best we could at the time. To second guess ourselves won't change anything. So now I rest in knowing our life has significantly changed in the last 2 months. My responsibility load has been lightened and God's timing has been in it all. He knows far more what each day and year will bring. While the process has not been an easy one, He knows.   

An update...

It is late...
My mind is a whirling.
Fun Girl, "don't want to be a pest...but you haven't updated your blog in a while."
Me, "I don't know what to write.  Life is tough right now.  I cry a lot"
I just viewed my last post posted.
It was the afternoon before the car accident.
Life was great that day.  Blogging and computer stuff done.  Kiddo at a Christmas party, looking to what all needed to be done for the holidays.  On our way to work Bingo to pay for Hockey Player's hockey and life came to a halting stop at the red light. 

We were stopped.  The kid admitted to being distracted.  He stopped only after crashing into us.  Things could have been so much worse.  That they weren't I am grateful.  I was stunned, dazed and, well, just going with the flow.  I didn't feel right but stayed quiet.  We went on to Bingo.  My leg went numb, got heavy and eventually I sat down and helped with paper work.  The next morning, I was dizzy and weak... Eventually I was in the ER.  A concussion. 

A week later in the ER again.  Post-concussive syndrome. 

It is not good to sit in the car sideways.  I was sitting at an angle so I could face Hubby while he drove and we talked.  Instead of a front to back concussion, I was hit from the side.  Bummer.  Brain doesn't like that too much.  I slept a lot for the 2 weeks after the accident.  There is a lot I don't remember from about Thanksgiving till now.  Pictures help.  Talking helps.  Sometimes looking at the calendar.  But for the most part, the memories are mostly gone.  But I know my kiddos have been gems.  They have loved on me and taken care of me. 

A week after the accident, the call came.  Granny was gone.  There was to be no services or viewing.  She was gone.  I slept a lot.  The kids and I still have yet to fully process she is gone.  It is just a big silence in our life.  None of us really know how to talk about it. 

In the meantime, my mom is declining in leaps.  Agitated and confused.  She doesn't always recognize us, or she does and doesn't know why we are familiar. The year ends and a new one begins.  We find ourselves saying good-bye and grieving.  Mom will be moving soon.  She wanders now and doesn't know us a good amount of the time.  They will move to Colorado, there are more siblings/kids there to help out and support.  More than just me.  Colorado is home to my parents.  Where they want to be.  I know with this move, we are saying good-bye.  Visits will be farther and fewer.  Her memories of us will slip faster with our absence.

And I sleep a lot.  I have aggravated my concussion a couple of times.  I can't be silly and shake my head at the kids.  It hurts.  Accupuncture helps a lot with the pain.  But it is not long lasting.  More follow up with the doctors to happen.  Hoping for the doctor okay to travel to Colorado with my mom.  There is a concern about the change in altitude and pressure on my brain.  I have an extra motivation in going...I want to see my preggy niece.  My first grand-neice on my side of the family.  I love being an auntie and look forward to changing my title to GREAT Aunt!  She is due soon.  I can't remember the due date.  If it wouldn't be too soon, it would be cool if she popped out to see me while in Colorado.  Wouldn't that be lovely....snuggles with a super sweet wee new born.  Ahhh!
I keep telling Hubby I need a baby girl of my own.  The kids think my concussion is even worse than the doctors have said.

School planning needs to be done.  Hoping between naps and appointments this week, I will accomplish this one GREAT BIG task. 

Ready for the Big Bumps!

 Remember this post last month?

 

 

Well now, he is free and clear!

Not much of a smile for the camera.

But he is excited and ready for the Big Bumps.

 

 

And what exactly are Big Bumps?  I don't really want to know.

This past weekend, Daddy O and I worked Bingo. 

Hockey fundraisers to help pay for, well, Hockey.

Couple of dads were talking.

Dad One asked if Hockey Player was back. 

Dad Two said yes, and I responded "sorta."

There was a choked back laughter.

See, DaddyO was otherwise busy elsewhere in the room.

I KNEW something was up.

I explained Daddy O told me there was no contact allowed, so Hockey Player got on the ice for a game on Thursday.

 Some how it came out....not sure how.

Hockey Player took a hit in the corner.

Went down, then knocked the other guy down.

DaddyO returned and I tolded him, he was busted....

His response, Just a little bump!

Hockey Player even jumped up and let DaddyO know all was good.

 

Good Heavens Can't Trust the Two of the Them to Follow Doctor's Orders.

 

Cornered Hockey Player the next day and asked about his hit.

His response, "HUH?? What hit?"

Just a little bump.

Told him he was busted.

Couldn't remember knocking anyone else down.

 

I get told to quit making it a big deal.

 

Doctor laughed and shooked his head.

Said he would see us the next day.

Not funny doc.

Just to prove it, I told him we would be at church and not hockey.

Well then maybe Friday.

 

better NOT!

 

 

 

Sisterly TLC

I come home from the doctor's office with Hockey Player last week

and discovered The Man on my couch.

 

But it wasn't as simple as all that may sound.

 

He has my bed pillows arranged just so,

providing him with support and cushion while he plays on someone's I touch.

 

I, of course, wonder who he thinks he is to be able to lay around in such comfort and leisure?

 Instead of laughing,

 I ask in my motherly tone why he is not working on his school work.

He doesn't mention feeling sick or having a cold.

Nope.

  Instead he very quickly starts his explanation with,

"It was Little Princess's idea!".

Now that was a new one.

  His sister's idea to pamper and fluff her brother.

Yeah, right!?!

Then he story comes out.

 She opened a door, smashed his foot and left a mark on it.

 I am sure the drama and anguish that was displayed was being left out of the report.

 She was sorry and didn't mean to hurt him.

 In an attempt to make it all better she took care of her brother.

 He looks really hurt, doesn't he?

I want a Little Princess for a sibling.

He is armed and dangerous

This past weekend, I stayed home sick.  It was hockey weekend in OKC. We are still waiting on news if there will be any more tournaments this year. We are short on numbers for a team. Parents are thinking and discussing. So, it was with disappointment, I chose to stay home. It might be the only tournament of the year and I am missing it.

 

Coughing and blowing and sneezing in a car...in a hotel room...not fun, not fun for anybody. 

Definitely is not a recipe for good rest for every one there.

 

So I stayed home.

The girls stayed too.

 

Daddy O did his best to keep me updated.

 

First game, I received multiple texts.

Boys were doing great and winning.

First game was a win!

 

Rest and food and fun

 

Game 2

Daddy O texts with scores.  Then Daddy O calls. He is concerned about Hockey Player. Coach is not putting him on the ice. My first thought is his foot. Daddy O doesn't know. I ask if I should call coach on the bench and he tells me No.

**sigh**

All I want to do is be there, cross the ice, and check on my boy. Coach recently assured me, he remembers the rules.  I pray and wonder.

 

Another phone call Daddy O was able to attract Hockey Player's attention.

Did thumbs up and thumbs down....HP's response ~ thumbs down.

 

Sigh...so far away.

Game is over, we lost and my thoughts are on HP

Daddy O calls and reports in,

Hockey Player says, "My arm feels broken. Like all the other broken bones."

 

Any other time, I would laugh.

 

But he is in another state and I want him home.

Daddy O tells me he has limited mobility.  Hurts to move his hand or hold anything. I suggest (in my mommy way) to skip the ER. All they will do is XRay and confirm.  No bone sticking out so emergency surgery is not required. They will tell us to follow up with our doc.

 

Cha-ching $150 for the hospital.

 

Come home.  Immediate care on Sunday with out doc. We have had so many mis-diagnosises, I prefer for him to discover my kid's fractures...

 

Call one of the other hockey moms and ask, "Is Dad giving me the sanitized version?"

Yes and No.  He missed the hit, cause little brothers were distracting him.

 

I get the story.

 

HP went to the boards, his hand was on the boards

another player came in broadside to his arm

all legal

but sticks, hits and power

I know in my heart it is broken.

What IT is, is the question.

Wrist

Both arm bones

 

They come home.

Difficulty sleeping...

My boy is stoic and quiet...more so than usual.

He doesn't antagonize his sisters.

I can see the pain in his eyes.

 

At the doctors, he is all quiet and laid back.  Not really giving doc details.  So I step in, that is what Moms do, right?  Doc examines and pulls and not a single word or OW or stop. That is what I get at home.

 

I step in again and tell doc, he is too quiet for his own good.

 

Doc, very politely tells me, "I see him flinching, I know."

 

hmmmph, I guess I need to be still  Really hard to do...my 3.5 pound bag of sugar is hurt.  Did I mention I wrapped my arms around him the night before and cried. Cried and cried until he asked if he could "..go to bed now?"  I see the man he is becoming, but I also see him as 6.5 weeks earlier and 3.5 pounds in a isolette in the NICU.  The tiny bundle my body evicted way too soon.

The tiny boy I sat and covered in prayer and wore my heart on my sleeve for. The tiny baby I fought to bring home with me. I want good for him. I want for him to play hockey if that is what he wants.I want for him to be healthy and whole.

So we go to XRAY.

After XRay we are sent to the procedure room

We are put in an exam room.

I get a little excited, must not be broken.

But doc comes in.

Broken.

Not as bad as it could be considering.

One bone.

Not the wrist.

Not into the growth plate.

Much to be thankful for.

Brace for now, come back during the week to cast it.

Woohoo!  That means he gets to take a couple more normal showers.

Yeah, I love him... I just don't always like to smell him.

He is a teenage boy.

 

 He tries to do his school work this morning.  It is tough, he is right handed and it is his right arm in the cast.  We are getting a lesson in sibling relationships and when it interfere.  Dad's Bud joins us and starts to pester.  I warn Dad's Bud to back off.  But he doesn't know what that means and continues.  He starts messing with HP's arm.  Really?  I warn him.  Then I give HP permission to demonstrate the power of his arm.  Yes, I did.  What else do big brothers do, when little brothers won't back down because they are vying for territory and herd roles of leadership.  Big brothers pop them with their cast and demonstrate they are armed and dangerous and it is best to back down. 

Well Hockey Player didn't whack him.  I grabbed HP's arm and banged it into Dad's Bud's chest a few times until he said ow.  Point made.  Leave your brother alone. He has my permission to settle it.  He won't unless he has to, cause that is the kind of young man he is...

 

Brotherly Force as the last resort.

 

 

 

AND off it comes !!

Friday it was officially off!

The cast that is.

Hockey Player was up and ready to go.

I have never seen him so excited to go to the doctor.

He missed 4 hockey practices.

He had big plans for the night.

The cast was just adding insult to the injury.

 

AhhH!  relief is in sight.

Then doctor gave him instructions!

NO ice time till Wednesday.

That would be 5 days.

OH MY!!!

I thought the dad and son were going to fall into the floor.

There is a tournament coming up.

Doctor's face didn't crack.

Not one bit.

He didn't give an inch.

NO ICE TILL WEDNESDAY,

unless of course we want to come back in and see him.

For 5 days he is to work on flexibility and regain range of motion and strength.

You should of seen the pleading in my men's eyes.

Just a little bit of ice... he has to play on Saturday.

It was a good thing I was there.

I get to hold them accountable.

I don't know who was more disappointed, the dad or Player.

After limping this weekend and working so hard on getting range of motion back,

I think Hockey Player is getting a good dose of understanding.

There has been plenty of limping and wincing as he gets that foot and ankle back

to where he wants it to be. 

But don't be fooled, this kid when he gets back on the ice, he will leave it all out there on the ice.

He doesn't slow down. 

The doc knows this.

He has a warrior's heart

and he will fight wounded if not strapped down and sat on by his mother.

I just remind these two brutes of mine,

Gotta live in this body for the rest of your life.

No point in destroying it in the first 13 years and living in pain for the next 80.

 

 

What on earth? Better yet what on high seas?

 

It is Hockey Player still. 

So the plastic bag trick doesn't work too well in the shower.

He had to get another cast.

I begged. I pleaded.  I offered this kid $20 to get a hot pink cast.

To get out of his normal color palette.

Nope

I offered $40.

Still no.

I offered his choice of places for lunch.

Still no.

I offered $40 and lunch.

Still no. 

He is a man of principles and he sticks to them. 

For that I am very proud.

 

Considering he would only be stuck with it for a week, I am shocked.

His jeans are long and baggy. They cover it up. 

Glad he didn't take his mother's money though.

As for lunch, well it was food and he was happy.

He was really happy when I showed up to his piano lessons with pizza in the suburban.

It was an eat in the car kind of day!

And yes, minus one slice, he did all that damage. 

 

 

 

 

Hockey Player does it again!

He causes the doctor to chuckle.  According to his memory and math he gets reunited with plaster and bandages every other year.  So he should be clear until his freshman year of high school.  A stumble at youth group on Sunday.  Come Thursday he is still icing and hobbling after playing with siblings for a couple of minutes.  I am fed up and schedule the appointment.  After the initial exam doc says we will leave with a cast.  For how long would depend on the Xrays.  Told Hockey Player to start thinking about colors.
The final verdict: A mid foot sprain.  Doc knows Hockey Player.  Knows he has a high pain tolerance.  Remember when he finished the second half of a game with a broken ankle and then played the next game.  This past week he just kept pushing on and quietly getting an ice bag when needed.  Pastor at church on Sunday suggested he hurt his whiner bone.  He doesn't know Hockey Player too well, yet.  So with Doc's verdict of the sprain he said a cast for two weeks to insure the foot is rested.  No lawn mowing.  No running. Postpone the birthday party.  No attaching an ice blade to the cast and skating.  No trampoline or bicycling and no kicking siblings with it.  There was a long list of instructions just to make sure he was clear that he needed to stay OFF the foot.  Mom is head shaking and laughing.  So glad it is not broken.  Dad is perturbed. He will be mowing the yards by himself the next couple of weeks.  Doesn't seem to faze Hockey Player.  Look at that smile!

 

...7..8..9..10....Cast or Not Here We Come

For me it has been a week. Just busy. All the mom hats I keep juggling. This week we took Flutter Nutter to the ENT for post-op follow-up. A+, Great ! But since it is in the same building as our other doctors, the stories from April come up. AND...We were there just lask week to get Flutter Nutter's cast removed and arm x-rayed again. We will be there next week, for one more follow-up on the broken arm. Not to mention all the other "little" incidents. Have I ever mentioned the ladies at the front desk, who check us in, know us. They KNOW us. THEY KNOW ALL my kids by NAME. THEY KNOW them so well, they often don't have to ask us for birthdates to verify who we are. THEY KNOW US!
So this crazy, busy week as I try to get ready for FUN MOM's 15th birthday. Yep, 15! I am little buzzy over that one. Driver's permit here she comes if she ever finishes her freshman year. I may just fail her in a couple of subjects. Of course, 11 year old Hockey Player, has this light fuzz of a mustache going on and he'll be 12 soon. Little Princess cries at the drop of a hat, slams doors and is sooo obviously becoming hormonal with her 10th birthday looming around the corner. It is so much fun, when Fun Mom doesn't understand why Little Princess is being "so, so, so WHAT is wrong with her???" Well let's see, when did you hit puberty, Fun MOM? Her response, "10.5-11 years old???"
MMMhmmm, and how old is she???
Fun Mom immediately collapses in "No Way ! ! NOOOooooOOOOoooOOO, she is my LITTLE sister."

But back to topic, what does casting got to do with all this. Defintely not fishing this time. I am in this little tumbleweed called life. A friend is over, taking care of late afternoon stuff. Feeling a bit overwhelmed cause I am having difficulty finding the correct feathers. Another topic in of itself. But they are needed for the birthday this week.
In this tumbleweed, of my so called life, walks Flutter Nutter sobbing. He has tripped over Gus. Gus is our friendly bark-o-meter. He likes to be underfoot. Unfortunately.
So perceiving these cries were more of indignation, I ask Flutter Nutter, "Is this a hurt cuz something is broken and we need to go to the doctor."
FN: "No" He comes to get a hug and walks back off to go play.
Minutes later, in walks two of the neighbor boys, "Hockey Player is hurt."
OKay, my brain switches pathways and I think, is this the kind of hurt that is bothering them more than Hockey Player. Well, I don't hear crying, must be okay. Didn't quite register that Hockey Player doesn't cry, holler, sob or wail, he just gets very stoic and even more quiet.
But wait, here comes Hockey Player, and in my experienced mom way I ask, "Anything broken?"
To which he responded, "I don't think so, it just hurts."
OK. Good, go on doing your thing. Back to the tumbleweed.
30-45 minutes later, things are calming down on the homestead some. House is quiet and my nerves and thoughts have quieted some as well. In walks Hockey Player, very quietly, "My arm really hurts."
OKKKkkkkaaaay.
I have him come to me. I manipulate it, touch, poke, prod. Get some "oOoOOOows", and some "that doesn't hurts." What did you do exactly? I was hiding, and Daddy's Buddy was in the suburban. I didn't know he was. He opened the door and... WHACKED his brother good. Where is the eye ball rolling dizzy little emoticon for a time like this? ? Who knew Hide and Seek could be so dangerous?
Call the doc, cause it is 4:30, and maybe they can give me some guidance. I am sooo very tired of walking in there with injuries this Spring. There is no bruise, no swelling, just a bump. But it is a bump with a scratch. I get those bumpy scratches too. Nurse tells me, yes, can have a broken bone with no swelling and no bruising. Really ? ? Learning something new, again!
However, if his arm is broken, all they can do tonight is Xray it and confirm one way or the other. No casting till the next day. So, we have a choice. Keep him comfortable for the night and go in the next day or go to the doc possibly 2 days in a row. Hockey Player, opted being kept comfortable and waiting for 'tomorrow'.
At one point, he gets nauseated from the pain. But then he is fine. Ice and elevation. This morning it hurts more. At the doctor's office, it doesn't hurt that bad, BUT he is trying to tie his shoe with one hand. It doesn't hurt so bad, as long as he doesn't move it.
Off to X-ray. Where they know us very well. However, I did have to clarify this visit was for a new injury, different child. I am holding a brace in my hand. Forgot to mention, Fun Mom pulled out her brace from when she sprained her wrist, just happened to be for the left arm, and gave it to Hockey Player the night before, for stability. The reception asked us, if we had come into the doc and got the brace, or we had one already. Laughter, and yep, we had one at home that happened to fit. From there the conversation digressed.
In some families, the kids wear hand-me down clothes. The Clark household wears hand-me down casts and braces. We wondered if we could hand-me down stitches as well. And mind you, we do have the casts from the past. So we could rubber band those on. Good to know, if we ever find ourselves without insurance. So, I am psychotically laughing by now. X-rays are done and it is time to get the news. No Broken Bones, a Bruised Bone. To which the doctor tells Hockey Player, you can milk this one for a while. He then proceeds to pulling out a sling, telling us Hockey Player should keep his arm in the sling until he feels his arm is doing well enough without it. I, of course, ask how long this typically is. 10 days or so. WOW! Hence, the permission to milk this one for a while. Fortunately, he hurt his left arm. So he can still do work. I graciously pointed this out and that if he really wanted to get out of school work, he would need to get a serious concussion that would prevent him keeping his eyes open and keep his head hurting enough so that thinking would be difficult.
Bruised Bone. A new one for us.

April Reflections, part 5, the finale

Day 8 of this roller coaster. I am blogging.
I truly hope, this will be the last of the spring time excitement. I have yet to check, but I think we are probably close to having exhausted our flex account.
Monday morning started with a quick shower, history lesson about Justinian 1 and Theodora. I knew it would be the only lesson I would get done for the day.
Flutter Nutter in his PJs is out the door promptly at 8 am.
Time for ear tubes.
All went well, till the recovery.
I did not expect 30 minutes of crying.
and drama...remember the ER.
DRamA.
Flutter Nutter is king of drama.
Nurse would walk into the recovery area and wailing and sobbing when resume.
Thermometers were as scary as a horror film.
I was compassionate. I was kind. But completely not prepared emotionally for how emotional he was. I mean, I had ear tubes. I remember being a little freaked out by bloody cotton balls laying by my head and the fact I was in bed with a sheet over me and my gown and undies were missing. But then again, that was 30 years ago. I don't remember crying.
I asked him what he wanted to eat.
FN: "I can't eat today!" more sobbing.
Misunderstanding, fasting only until surgery was over.
In that case. McDonald's.
Can do.
Then he remembers the lollipops.
The nurse comes into the room.
FN: "I think that was worth 2"
She looks at me.
I laugh. He thinks what he has been through is worth 2 lollipops. She smiles.
And returns with another lollipop.
So I take him to McDonald's and like any good mother, I remember the Gymboree email I received this morning.
Gymboree is 2 miles away.
I coax him into letting me shop. $2.99 sale! TV, chairs, lounge and rest. Drink your root beer.
YES! He agreed. Turned out to be a good thing. An hour later, he was feeling much better and ready to see his siblings.
I scored some awesome deals.
Casting in the afternoon. More appointments scheduled for the ENT and follow up for the broken arm.
Wiggles, and wiggles and wiggles.
FN: "I am not allowed to hit you guys with my cast!"
That's right. Rule number 1 from the doctor.
Daddy's Buddy is quick to say he would have chosen the neon green. Without thinking, I said, "Well, break your arm and you can have whatever color you want."
Hmmm, running out of humor and patience and little fried.
Doctor was quick to say, "Shhh, don't say that. That one would likely take you up on it!"
CHOKE, GAG, he's right, what was I thinking?
By now, my boys look like they have beaten each other up. But it is all self~inflicted.
Do they slow down? No.
Do they care their mother's nerves are shot? No

Then.... yes, there is a then....
Almost bedtime and FN has a gushing bloody nose. Noticed by Little Princess.
Caused by picking his nose, of course.
Blood everywhere. We are trying to clean him up.
He sobs, dramatically, of course,

"It's just be mean to Flutter Nutter Day!"

and I am sure it very well felt like that. Tubes, fasting, casting, nose bleeds, blankies being washed...

Tomorrow had better be "Pamper the Mom day, cause she needs a vacation!"

April Reflections, part 4...

Easter Morning arrives.
Unfortunately, it didn't have the same bright, sunny outlook in my heart. I love Easter. But after the week I had been having, I was in survival/crisis mode. I just couldn't summon the excitement of the day and the time to celebrate with family. I wanted a quiet place. A place where noone could get hurt. Starting to dread the sound of a whimper, cry or my name being called. When the kids wiggled too much, anxiety was starting to seize me. They just needed to be still.
Of course, Flutter Nutter was still coming off the steroids and that was super difficult for him. AND for ME!
We make it through the morning and lunch no injuries.
Off to my in-laws for the games, hunt, and more food.
Flutter Nutter managed to fall trying to climb over a cinder block. Caught himself with his broken arm, but scraped up his knee pretty good. He fell over the brick that surrounds the fireplace, someone caught him just in time. FINALLY, he fell head first into Grandpa's exterior door. Another good egg on the top of his head. He split the wood on the door.
I wAs DoNE!!
DONE .
There was joking and laughing, warrior stuff, brush it off, haha...
The type of things I say, nOrmAlLY.
But not today.
Not this time.
I very firmly, (probably almost hysterically) told BigODaddyO, Flutter Nutter was going to sit down with an ice pack on his head. I DID NOT CARE what anyone else had to say or think about it. I was DONE and he was going to be iced !
Then, I went and finished my PEPSI.

April Reflections, part 3...

Yep, part 3. I don't know how many parts there are going to be.
So we get the young man splinted up and home.
There wasn't much sleeping that night. The docs failed to give us anything for the pain, his or ours. So I held out till it daylight and paged the doc on call. Sweet Tylenol with Codeine was called out for us! Hope for sleep that night! ! !
Alas, we still have a full day. We don't stop, no siree, this crew just keeps putting one foot in front of the other.
We deliver dad's boat to the marina. We deliver children to the aunt's house to fill Easter eggs. We sneak in a mini nap. Head home, but pick up the TyLeNoL with CODEINE! Feed children. Go over the outdoor play rules.
"MOOOOooooM! ! Daddy's Buddy has a goose egg on his forehead!"

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So not excited. I mean, they didn't say he fell out of the fort. How bad could it be?

Oh my stinking WORD! It was the size of the Easter eggs they had been filling!
What did HE DO? ? ?

"I hit my head like this.." (he nods his head forward)

Really??? Just to hit your head? WHY? ? ?

DB: "NOOoooo, we were wrestling up in the fort and I fell like this (forward) into that piece of wood (2X4), like this (nod)"

Somehow in all of that these words came trickling out of my mouth..
"Really? ! ? ! ?"
"Wrestling in the fort?"
"After your brother just fell and broke his arm?"
"What on earth?"
"That's it, everyone in!"
"Showers! BED! I AM DoNe, DONE, DONE!!!!
I wish I could say the story ended there.
You see, earlier in the day, we were alerted to some very red hands. VERY RED Hands! Bright red. There was a time before, when we couldn't identify the source of the red color. Well thankfully, God reminded me of the koolaid packets I had discovered in the back of the suburban while we were hooking up the boat.
NoT bLoOd this time.
So it is bath time for Daddy's Buddy. He likes showers, but his hands are still dyed red and I sentenced him to a long soak to get his hands back to their normal color. Easter is the next day and Mom would like the kids to look somwhat nice considering the goose eggs, black eyes, scrapes, stitches and broken arm.
Bath is over and Daddy's Buddy comes crying. "My hand still stings."
What? ? Why would his hand be stinging?
First thought, he was messing with the razors...
I ask to see his hand.
Sure enough, superficial (doesn't need stitches) slice from the palm to the first knuckle on the finger.
"What did you do?" I asked.
DB: "When I hit my head, I went like this. (Caught himself with his hands.) There was big pieces of wood in my hand, but (with some enthusiasm here) I pulled them out."
** SIGH **
Neosporin, band aides, eczema creams, bed.

April Reflections, part 2...

So, I am thinking, I should know by now there will be at least 1 week of roller coasting every spring and fall. Something about the change of seasons and activity level of my children. I am never prepared for it.

So in my last post I discussed Daddy's Buddy adventure. I completely forgot to mention we were at the dr. office on Monday for Flutter Nutter. Simple sinus infection...nope, sinus infection with bronchitis developing and wheezing. Dr. decided breathing was an important thing for the kid so he put him on STEROIDS and ALBUTEROL breathing treatments. Sounds like the dr. doesn't like me. We are sent to the ENT the next day.

ENT says lots of fluid and diminished hearing. TuBeS will be needed. OK...I am OK, I can deal with this.

So I spend the afternoon making phone calls and setting up appointments for the oral surgeon and ear tube surgery. (Yes, oral surgeon. I have 2 girls who will get to have oral surgery this spring/summer.)

Normal Wednesday after stitches and phone calls on Tues. Relatively normal Thursday.

Friday evening.

"Flutter Nutter fell, he is crying!"

"Flutter Nutter fell, from the fort!"

I have to make sense of 3 children ages 9, 7, and 6 as they tell stories of what happened and try to coax a sobbing 5 year old to tell me what hurts and what happened. Apparently, only the 6 yr. old saw what happened, and only briefly as she went about playing. Flutter Nutter was too preoccuppied crying to be able to tell me much. I did manage to discover he could not hold a bowl with his left hand. His eyes appeared to be equal and reacting to light appropiately. From what I could piece together, he fell about 8 feet onto a 2x4. His face was scraped pretty good, a few scrapes on his neck and back. But his arm.... not so good.

Into the car. Hockey Player went with us. Needed someone to keep an eye on him in the back seat. Good thing.

All was fine. Immediate Care could see him. Then he fell asleep. FELL ASLEEP. Couldn't hold his head up as we tried to talk to him fall asleep. He did cry really hard for 30 minutes. There was a huge adrenaline rush, and exhaustion tends to follow after that. BUT, he did fall 8 feet and he did hit his head. So the dr. office sent us to the ER. Hockey Player sat with him and tried to keep him awake. About a mile from the ER he gets Flutter Nutter to play I SPY. Checked in, he's counting to 15 and remembers 2 months ago we were there in the ER and he got a popsicle. Does he get another one??? he wants to know. Concussion ruled out.

Xrays, more tears, a buckle fracture of the wrist.

I try to wipe his face clean and discover splinters sticking in his cheek. I ask for tweezers and get a doctor. I hold him down and dr. removes splinters. Arm gets splinted, we get sent home.

Friday night! As we leave, Flutter Nutter is being a bit dramatic. Even the doctor commented on his drama skills. I lovingly encouraged FN to try out the children's theatre. Wouldn't be wonderful if one day he was accepting an Oscar, and was able to thank his mother for the time we were in the ER and she encouraged him to pour that passion and emotion into theatre. He didn't think that was such a great idea.

Webinz manages to be a wonderful distraction. How I am able to respond so calmly? It is only by the Grace of God. My sense of humor, again, the Grace of God.

April Reflections, part 1...

The morning after a sleepless night and I must write these thoughts and memories down before I forget. There just might come a day I need to hand some of these stories over to the children I am blogging about.
It has been an interesting week to say the least.
Monday started off busy as always. Tuesday came along and I scratched my plans to head out for the evening and opted to curl up with the kids and ice cream. It would have been better for all of us if we had headed out. Approaching 7:00 and with bedtime looming I told these sweethearts to get a move on, get ready for bed, get their ice cream and lets watch this movie or there won't be time before lights out. What sweet, obedient children they are, the obeyed and got busy. Daddy's Buddy hurried to do my bidding and ran into his brother's bowl of ice cream. Hockey Player came into the room and said DB was crying because he ran into his bowl. Not too alarmed, not hearing the cries, I didn't think too much of it.
In walks Daddy's Buddy and blood is running down his face and I see a hole to the side of his eye. I YELL, "Go to the kitchen!" Of course, then everyone is wanting to know what is wrong. I just know I want blood on the kitchen floor, not the carpet and everywhere else. We have done that before.
Quick call to Immediate Care and they have a pediatrician on duty that can do stitches. Into the car with DB and the rest stay home to watch the movie and eat ice cream. As we are leaving DB asks, "What about my ice cream?" To which I holler into the house, "Put DB's and my ice cream in the freezer please. Bedtime is 8:30"
But it only gets better. The receptionist, nurses and doctor all ask, "How did you cut yourself?"
DB and I respond with, "Ran into a bowl of ice cream?"
"No, really, what happened?"
Me: "Really, he ran into a bowl of ice cream."
I then have to explain the looming bedtime, the movie they want to watch and ice cream they want to eat and the hurry to grab a bowl and get sat down for the movie. Then they want to know what kind of bowl. A normal, rounded, cereal bowl, that is very cold with ice cream. In response, we discover this is a first for them. Bowl of ice cream takes out boy! Then I pull a mom moment, as they get everything ready to numb and stitch. There is a little (much littler) girl out there waiting to be stitched as well. I tell DB he has to be really brave and not scare her with lots of screaming and crying.
2 Stitches later and lots of bravery on his part we are home eating ice cream and watching Tangled. DB is appropiately impressed with Rapunzel's ability with a cast iron skillet.

Return to Hockey !

Hockey season is upon us this year. It will be double the fun and double the craziness. Daddy's Buddy is now a Hockey Player TOoO! He has let me know that he does not want to be known as Daddy's Buddy on my blog. So until I come up with a new nickname that I just love and think fits this guy of mine, Daddy's Buddy he remains. (Good thing he doesn't get on the computer and read the blog yet...) I may have to rename Hockey Player and hand down his nickname....but it just doesn't feel right.
Hockey season started with a bang and an injury! First game, first 30 minutes and Hockey Player was down. But not for long. Sat out to catch his breath and then back on the ice he went. Big O Daddy O wouldn't let Mom check out Hockey Player. He is a Warrior after all. (Aren't all boys!) A mistake that BODO won't make again. Took his skates off between 2 games, and it was a challenge getting that skate back on for the second game. AND Hockey Player played the second game. The next day (Monday) we discover he needs one of these:

2 weeks in a cast. 2 weeks in a boot. Easy return to the ice to condition the ankle. (Not really...there is no take it easy with this kid.) He overdid it and had to sit out the next week. Miss yet another set of games/tournaments. Back on the ice. Taping. Icing after games. Elevate it during the day during school (beautiful that we homeschool, the couch was his new workstation!) The ankle weathered the week with just a little puffiness. So good, because it was hard to see these disappointed eyes.

This boy loves hockey. Can't get his attention, say a hockey term or just hockey. Boom back on planet earth he returns and he is looking to see where the action is. :) He now has a team of moms that worry about him. Just what every hockey player wants! But hey, he is back on the ice now...

This weekend both boys participated in the Kansas Cup. A wonderful hockey mom shared her pictures with me. So I have these of Hockey Player. I am waiting for the Bestest Aunt Sharon to pass on the pictures she took to me, so I can share memorable moments of both boys. So pictured above is getting back to business ! His serious expression his the only sign of how glad this boy is to be back on the ice. Feet, pucks and sticks belong on the ice. Ice does not belong on the body. :) First tournament back and it feels oh so good to end with one of these team pictures:

and one of these pictures of pure triumph and joy!

And yes, he did receive a pretty awesome check this weekend. Fortunately, Mom looked to check on one of the kiddos and missed it. To hear Big-O-Daddy-O tell it, makes the momma sick and she gets a lump in her throat. All of his new moms checked in with me to make sure he was okay. I just keep saying thank you Lord for preventing me from seeing it. So good to know he has a crew to watch out for him. He may not like it, but it is comforting and encouraging to this mom. He got back in the game and finished up. I was able to watch the Championship game later without as much angst and enjoy watching him have fun.

When asked later by BODO about the check, "It didn't hurt a lot, but it didn't hurt a little." In contrast, when he was checked and broke his ankle, "It didn't hurt at all." So it was a harder check, just like everyone said, the second time around. He did get back in the game. His chest was sore and his chin scraped up, but all is good and that is hockey for you! A checking clinic is on the horizon. Never been so intent on signing up for a clinic as I am this time.

I am hoping, maybe Daddy's Buddy finds a different sport he likes. I am grateful Flutter Nutter isn't too interested in playing sports. He is just interested in girls and computer games. For now, I will just go along for the ride and look forward to when i can see the Aunt Sharon's pictures of the boys.

Dads, Sons and the Mom

First hockey game of the season.
I am working in the church nursery and show up before the second game.
On arrival, I am told Stephen was checked but ok. He sat out a few rotations because his ankle hurt. Dad roared and said I was not allowed to go to the locker room to check on him. I do try to respect the men and man~children in my life. Fine line between being mom and overly-mothering.
Next thing I hear is they are having a hard time getting his skate on, his ankle is swollen. But he'll try to skate during warm-up and see how it feels.
Momma bear is trying to stay quiet.
Hockey Player plays and the Mom can tell he is hurting. Not skating like he usually does.
Afterwards, I tell him I will see him at home. I also tell him, when he gets home he needs to soak his foot in epsom salts. (More so I don't have to smelly his funky foot, when I look at it.) Come home and take a look. A huge golf ball has somehow managed to work its way under my son's skin. Yowzer! Momma Bear insists on a trip to see the doc. But calls the doc on call for backup with the dad and son.
Left doc's office with a diagnosis of "severe sprain". Possible fractures but need the radiologist to look at. Get a call later, radiologist doesn't think there is a fracture.
This morning, Hockey Player is asking for pain medicine. It hurts to stand on it. He doesn't want to elevate it, because then it hurts to stand. Call to the doctor. He shouldn't be in that much pain with a brace on his foot.
Doc pulls up the xrays on his computer which is really a cool thing. He zooms in, spins the pics, zooms out, clicks a few times. Checks the spot on the xray where Hockey Player has the most pain. His knobby little ankle bone is fractured on the tip. Hard to catch fracture, but there all the same. Pretty purple/blue ankle this morning. I tried to get him to choose the purple cast. I even suggested the hot pink one. He chose royal blue.
Needless to say Dad and Hockey Player now know Mom will enter the locker room regardless of their wishes. The other players can run, hide, turn around it doesn't matter. I am not looking at them. Mom will take the skates and hide them. Hockey Player is too young to be playing injured.
Fun Mom thinks aloud, wish I could break my leg. She seems to like the attention Hockey Player is getting. She doesn't want the pain though. Mom can only shake her head. Enough drama for the rest of the year. Doctor is laughing because he only just saw Hockey Player for a physical last Thursday.
At least there's no locker rooms for 6 weeks. Whew... the boys can relax.
If I can bring myself to take pictures later, I will post them.

Blessed are the Feet....

To those who have prayed for us on this trip, thank you very much.
Hockey Player was Divinely Protected on Saturday afternoon.

I really like the verse from Romans 10:15
How beautiful are the feet of those that bring good news.

I love baby feet. I marvel over my children's feet how they grow and change. The difference in them now compared to when they were wee babies. I wrinkle my nose and try to not gag as they aren't quite so sweet smelling as they are getting older. But they are beautiful, for they carry my children to me and to others. Feet taking a beating. They can affect how a person feels overall. Tend need lots of protection and TLC.

A teammate unintentionally stepped on Hockey Player's bare foot.
Not a big deal unless of course the teammate is wearing sharp ice hockey skates.
A little to the left, a little to the right and our story would be different.
But as I started out with, Hockey Player's foor was Divinely protected by our Precious Lord.

FYI: I am not posting pics of the injury, was not a pic I could bring myself to take.

I can say this all calmly, but let me go back to the moment I heard.
Big O Daddy O: breathlessly asks, "Where are the bandaides? Hockey Player is cut. So and so stepped on it with his skate."
Me: I begin digging for bandaid. But my expressions is of alarm. A week and a half ago one of the team mates received 2 stitches for a gash to his leg. BODO tried to reassure me.
BODO: "It's not like cut to the bone or anything."
Me: I was undone. I had to go myself. BODO wasn't stopping this momma from seeing her boy.
BODO: following and saying, "It's not that big of a deal. Just a scrape really."
Me: I'll take care of it.
By the time I hit the rink doors, BODO was so far behind, I think he resigned himself to the fact this momma was going to take residence in the locker to take care of her boy's foot.

I got in there and there is a couple of bloody paper towels on the floor. He has another towel wadded up on his foot.
BODO was right, it wasn't too bad. There was no bone. It was more like a scrape, but more than a scrape. The blade shaved a chunk of skin off.

I then begin to do, what I know needs to be done. I send BODO to look for ointment. I clean it, hockey rink floors aren't the cleanest. Hockey players have to be really careful about staph infections. Skates and gloves can be really difficult to clean, dry out and disinfect.
BODO finds the ointment. We bandage him as best as we can till we can get to the hotel.

We clean it again and rebandage it again at the hotel. I didn't let him sleep with socks, to help it air out and form some sort of a scab. We start the process over in the morning. He was one tough cookie. He skated the first game as if there was nothing wrong with his foot. At one point, I saw BODO with him, which is very unusual. I knew something was wrong. The bandaid had slipped, or so he though. But only 3 minutes left in the game so it would have to wait.

Off the ice, another cleansing and it burned. Poor guy. But this time BODO carried him out of the rink to the lobby/concessions area to hang with the guys and left his foot air out. The "team medic" went and got him "new skin" but not before the next game started. So after all was done with the skating, more disinfectant and cleaning. And "new skin" painted on. HP, asks "how long is it going to sting?"
Poor guy.
Rides home with no sock or shoe.
His foot looks 10 times better. There is no redness and puffiness.
I can only give God the glory. Don't know how the blade missed more of the foot or the other toe, other than by Divine guidance. God's healing of his foot so quickly.

Wondering if Dad will go through what Mom goes through....

I am not talking about the flushing of too much toilet paper. Writing on the walls. Or the completely out of nowhere human anatomy discussions that happen occassionally. I am not referring to the squabbles and bickering or the bedtime stalling techniques.

Nope, I am wondering about the ER and Immediate Care visits. The crazy phone calls to the doctor's office. Cause, you see, whenever Big-O-Daddy-O is out of town or is working a shift where he is unreachable, something "BIG" happens. Someone needs stitches so Grandpa gets called to go to the airport to pickup Big-O-Daddy-O. Someone shoves something up the nose and a nasal extraction takes place. Someone breaks a bone. Straight line winds blow through the backyard, knocking the awning down and wrapping the trampoline around the swingset/fort. The battery in the truck dies at the park and of course you are there with all the kids, and noone in the cell phone directory is available. I am pondering along those lines. Mom goes into pre-term labor, though that is not a concern anymore. Mom has to super-glue a kid back together again. Staples to the back of the head are needed.
So I am pondering. Mom is going out of town this time.

I don't freak, I know the drill. None of it really phases me till later. I can think of only 3 times that still make me shudder. My son in an ambulance on oxgyen going to the hospital. My older son having nasal reconstruction surgery after breaking his nose. Almost losing my son this past winter when we was so dehydrated he was hospitalized for four days. It took 4 days to get him stable.

Dad, however, he is so not used to this. He was there when Hockey Player broke his arm and nose, Dad went into shock as well. I took a moment to touch Hockey Player's nose and notice how it moved with my touch, saw his arm was bent all weird. I grabbed the phone, dialed the doc's number, reached the emergency line and got directions for the best place to go. Told the kids to load up while on hold. They know the drill; isn't that sad, they know 'the off to the ER drill'. LOL. In the car and on the phone at the same time with my sister-in-law. Dropped kids off and on the way to the ER all before my husband came out of it. Then it was his turn to be cool and collected. I was the irritable and fussy mom cause my son was suffering and they weren't moving fast enough for MY comfort and his!

I am hoping, Daddy's Buddy took care of it all tonight. We were in the Immediate Care again. Stitches for his hand. He cut it, a story I can only roll my eyes over. They opted to superglue the cut on his palm. The skin stretches and moves so much, they hoped by gluing it the skin would stay in place better and he would heal faster. The "cut" (cause it gaped nicely and you could move it like a mouth) had a nice little chat with Daddy's Buddy. "Hi, I am your skin. I am here to protect you! Please don't cut me again! I keep infection out. When you cut me germs get in your body." Daddy's Buddy thought this was funny, but he got the point. I asked him to please stay all in one-piece while I was gone. Then we talked about how if they had super-glue when Humpty Dumpty fell, maybe the king's men and horses could have put him back together again.

So for now, I pray and pray and pray somemore. Big-O-Daddy-O does not need to experience this part of motherhood. He might never let me go again!

Just keep saying Thank you Lord!

This has been an interesting past 7 days. A week ago, I discovered one of Little Princess's friends broke her hand and was going to have surgery. Tonight at Awana registration, I heard of two more little girls who broke a finger this year. What is with the hands and fingers this month. I am just about to bring out the hockey gloves for the kids to wear. This week has been a lot about the fingers.
Little Princess went for a follow up on her finger early in the week.
We learned then, she was very fortunate. The break stopped just short of the growth plate. He showed me the xray, any further and she would have been in the operating room. He suggested another 2 weeks in a splint. Radiologist didn't recommend that, but he doesn't know Little Princess. In the first week she broke two splints. We made it about 5 days with the 3rd splint when it became covered with chocolate. How does that happen? Who knows? Unless of course, you know our Little Princess then you completely understand. So we tossed it cause she was playing piano with out it typing, etc.
So now for 2 weeks, no hand washing! Antibacterial gel, baby wipes only for her. Doc told her to leave it and the tape on. He also recommended she avoid getting it covered in chocolate. :) He did give us two extra splints, cause he knows Little Princess and these children of mine all too well. Hopefully, this little finger will have more time to heal before it is released back into the wild of this crazy life of ours.

Being right is not all that it is cracked up to be......

Another Clark record broken in our household. The new record is 3 bones.
It really stinks being right sometimes.
We went to Pump It Up to have our free play time compliments of the summer reading program rewards. Getting out of the car was all we could manage. "I didn't know my finger was there.... If I did I wouldn't of shut the door...." It is so hard to not laugh with a statement like that.

Sure enough I heard the door, then I heard the cry and turned around. Securely stuck between the door and car door frame was Little Princess's middle finger. The door completely shut. She managed to open the door and the tears rolled. One look and I remembered last December. You can check out the scoop here and here.

Unfortunately, her pediatrician is no longer practicing. We have yet to meet her new doctor, a family practice doc. The office was in upheavel as the computer system was down and there was not much left for sympathy. Being the Mom I am, who won't take no for an answer when it comes to something like this, or the other answer...wait till 5:00 for immediate care. I called the pediatrician's office (where they know me and my kids and that I have experience with broken bones and cuts needing stitches. They know I am not likely to be over reacting.) and asked if there was anyway to get her in.... Yes! only an hour and half wait. Still have to go home and deposit kids with big sis and get the motrin. They had plenty of sympathy left to pour out on her even though the computers were down. Gotta love pediatricians. I sure hope our doc's office get the girls a woman pediatrician soon.

No pictures this time. She got her nails done yesterday with her cousin Tricia. So we can't see how beautiful her natural nail color is this time. But doc believes she will lose the nail on this one as well. It took her thumb almost 6 months to grow back all the way. One less finger nail to trim, I guess. She did ask me this afternoon to not talk with anyone about it. I giggled and said, "You can't hide it babe, the splint is BIG." "I know..." So with all the love and sensitivity I could muster, I asked, "Can I put it on my blog? "
And well......she said, "I guess."