New seasons, New things, a few changes...

Life can be hard and difficult.  I considered staying here at Beach Gardens.  But the memories, right now are just difficult. The journey I am on, I just don't want to share on this blog.  I don't know how to explain it, but I am in a new season. It is needs its own journal, its own place.  I hope one day to come back... But for everything there is a season, this season I am over here at Faithfully Leaning and Counting.  Consider visiting me sometime and take a peek at what I am learning and doing.  I am still "under construction"  because I have to relearn much.. and it takes time.  I am getting there though.

My Teenager Theory

I have this theory.  I have, even in a brief embarrassing moment for my daughter, spoke to another teenager about my theory at an athletic event in Oklahoma.  Amazing what conversations can be had in a hotel elevator.  He nodded his head and agreed I had a point.
What is this theory?
Take your teenager's age and subtract ten.  That is their true age.  You just thought when you made it through the 2s and 3s life was going to get better.  Think crazed psycho laughter coming from me. 
NOPE!!!
The joys of 5 children in 10 years.  When my first was thirteen the last was 3.  I saw first hand one day when they both CHOSE to have a tantrum within minutes of each other.  Now I must say my oldest and youngest have a lot of similarities in their personalities.  That was my aha moment.  5 years later it has been observed by this Momma to be true more than not!
Today my 14 year old gave me flash backs to his younger years.  Gave him a job, took a shower and came back and it wasn't done.  Deer in the head lights look.  You meant now??  (or rather then?)  Now he did apply some critical thinking but his critical thinking led him straight back to the same choices he made when he was 4.  Look charming and absent of his mind!  I watch my younger two closely... 8 and 10.  I. IN. FOR. IT!!!
Today the 8 year old is crying because I set a timer for a handful of problems to be done in 30 minutes.  He would rather do the soccer homework for his coach on You Tube.  Yeah, whatever.  While he cries, he announces..."My head hurts!"  "There is no way I can do this!"  and the clincher, "I Hate my life!!!"  To which the almost 18 year old giggles and says, "I hate mine too." 
The 8 year old asks, "Why, because you are short?" 
The almost 18 year old, "NO, because, I am almost 18 and have to pay bills and work!" 
The almost 18 year old at some point also rolled her eyes an sighed..."The drama!!"
Yeah exactly!
So all you moms of youngers....I am warning it, enjoy them as they are cause they are who they are and are and they only get older... the drama gets more dramatic, the tantrums only get bigger and cluelessness loses some of its charm. 
We won't even discuss the prayers I say regarding the 10 year old.... He has his own set of quirks...like books belong in the closet and clothes belong on the bookshelf.  Beds are not for sleeping in...
I DON"T EVEN TRY TO IMAGINE WHAT HE WILL THINK WHEN HE IS A TEENAGER!!!
At least, I get a good laugh now and then. 
Lest you think it is all bad, it isn't.  They reach a certain wonderfulness between 9 and 12...They are helpful and capable and sometimes want to learn new things around the house.  Then they regress....A LOT!.  While they may act like the youngest you once knew ten years ago, you can have more intelligent conversations with them...just not when they have relapsed 10 years for whatever hormonal or emotional reason at the moment.  Deep breathes.  LAUGH!! it helps, just not when they are in their moment...run hide in the closet and laugh like a crazy person!

Why I don't blog....

My eldest has been giving me grief.  She likes to read my blog.  Which leaves me just a little bit puzzled.  I mean she lives here.  She knows what is going on.  So why does she need to catch up on our lives???
She reminds me gently I haven't posted in a while.  She tells me I need to finish posting about our vacation. 
I just look at her and wonder where she came from???
She even offers to paint my toes or do dishes so I will sit down and blog. 
I still don't get it.

Here is why I haven't blogged in no particular order:
Since July 1

We have had baseball
We have had summer volleyball
I have had memory therapy...yeah that went really well till I actually forgot an appointment.  That would have made a great post!
I had a child in Lego robotics...1/2 hour drive one way.
A child golfing weekly till mid July
summer dentist appointments
orthodontist appointments...put child #4 in braces
Throw in some physical therapy for the eldest cause she is a klutz when running late for work.
Church garage sale that ate up 30 hours of my life in one week...fun yes, but still that is a lot of hours for a crazed stay at home who rarely stays home.
My helpful eldest who shares driving responsibilities went away to Kids Camp the first week of July.  That really didn't help much.
Fall Volleyball started
Fall soccer started
College research started....
College enrollment worked on cause she is a senior and she can take 2 classes a semester this year.
Dog started having weird symptoms, talked to vet.  They think he is in the early stages of Doggie dementia.  Like I really needed that in my life. But he has these eyes and ears and well what are you going to do?
Cats that catch baby bunnies, birds, snakes, frogs and mice and create all sorts of a ruckus as a result. 
In other words, the animals can derail a day as much as the children can.
We started school last week.  What was I thinking????
I lost 2 sets of middle school curriculum.  Science and English.
Ordered replacements and found it all a week later.
But hey, the storage room is cleaned.
I cleaned Fun Girl's room for 6 hours and made $50.  Yep, I charged her for cleaning her room.
Also, accumulated a pile of clothes to put on EBay.
Sorted Boys clothes, another huge mountain of clothes for EBay. 
Sorted through Hockey gear and soccer gear...more EBay
Took about a thousand pictures for EBay.  It is easy to do.  Then I edited and deleted some.
Created High School transcripts.
Working on scheduling a college visit before sports have us out of town most of our fall/winter.
Planning a get away with Little Princess
First Aid on 2nd degree sunburns on kiddos this summer....4 times.  You would think we would get a handle on that.
And Memory therapy/Brain therapy is E x H a Us Ti NG !!! Like taking the ACT exhausting.  Requiring naps.  Anything that challenges my brain...that isn't saying much....almost requires an early bed time or nap.
I re-learned my Math Facts!!! 8s, 9s and up
Learning to work math faster.  Accepting I need to write most problems down now if I don't have a calculator.
Making lists everywhere cause well that is how my brain rolls these days.  Memory therapy helped a lot.  But I am "high functioning" so there isn't much they can do to help me.  Time and working on it and maybe I will get it all back, maybe not.  At least, I am high functioning...  I try to be grateful for that when the frustration builds about not being like I once was.
Trying to put the house back in some kind of order after this past winter and spring.
Sleep blessed sleep...which is where I am heading now. 
Life can be Hard.  Life is Full.  Life is Good. 
I am hoping soon, very soon, I can sit at the computer and do some more blogging.  Fun blogging. 
With pictures maybe.
But for you my dear Fun Girl, my latest update.  :)

Favorite Things....Recycle Bank

Recyclebank is..........
Awesome, great, best thing since sliced bread....well maybe I wouldn't go that far.
But pretty terrific.  And definitely one of my favorite tools these days. 

I wouldn't say I am a tree hugger. 
I don't get all crazy if I see recyclables in the dumpster, BUT I do like to do my part.
When God put Adam and Eve in the garden they were instructed to care for it.
I just see recycling as my part of being a good steward of God's Creation. 

So, after we were married and had child #1 aka Fun Girl, maybe after child #2 aka Hockey Player I started wanting to recycle more.  We did the aluminum cans.  (Hello--Money there!! and the kids were all over the change and so was I).  I started saving newspapers and dropping them off at the local grocery store. 

Hubby wasn't a big fan of having "trash" around. 
I bought trash cans to sort.
Not really buying it.

Child #3 aka Little Princess entered the world.

SHE. DID. NOT. LIKE. sleeping in her bed. 

Forget about napping there.

She liked the sling. 

She liked touching me. 

She liked being near me. 

She was a Momma's girl! 

Ahhhh, how sweet.  How wonderful....
Yeah, but every once in a while it is nice to NOT BE TOUCHED! 
The only other place she was willing to nap was in the car seat in a moving vehicle!

So I started brain storming.  I was all past the first - second child we gonna do this by the book to get her to sleep in her bed.  It was survival.  It was what ever will work for the now planning time.

So I created a schedule. 
A schedule of activities that needed/could be needed to be done every week. 
Each activity was assigned a day.

Do you see where I am going with this??
We went for a daily drive every day during nap time.  Oh yeah!!
Once a week we went to the library that had a drive through and on the way was the local recycling facility.  Oh yeah!!
How could Hubby complain about recycling that was dumped every week? ! ?
Hockey Player and Fun Girl would help to dump the containers, that is if they hadn't fallen asleep. 

If they were still awake, then we might stop at the park before going home.   It was amazing during that time period, how many errands I could come up with that required me to be out every day.  Of course, that was before the gas prices went up.  We won't discuss how un-ecological I was to be out driving every day of the week.  Because the choice was to save gas or sanity. 

Sanity won out!

Then Little Princess grew a bit more and the daily napping trips were no more.
By then I was recycling and Hubby was not impressed. 
Somewhere in there I had to give up my weekly trip to the library with a drive thru.  That is such an amazing perk for a library to have if you have nappers in the car.  With this trip gone, I had no where to drop off my recycling.  I couldn't justify the gas anymore.
Sad sigh!

The recycling stopped. 
Couple more kids added... #4 and #5 and I am thinking we are going to have to get a second dumpster.  A notice comes in the paper.  A new trial service is being offered through our trash company. 
RECYCLEBANK !
The best part, they supply the container.
No wait, the really BEST Part:
NO SORTING
Yep you read that right. 
NO SORTING!
You just toss all your recycling in the bin. 
Amazing.
No bins, no pile up.
How could Hubby refuse?
He humored me.
I signed up. 
Initially it was like $4 a month.
Points are earned based on weight.
Points are cashed in for rewards...coupons, gift cards, ecards
That first year, I pulled in rewards worth more than we spent!
Hubby was sold.
Of course, the first year on deals like that are pretty awesome. 
But honestly, I still pull out some pretty good rewards each year. 
Now, I accumulate gift cards to use for just that gifts. 
Hello Christmas shopping without the shopping.

As time has passed, they have, also, opened up their site to those who don't use them for curb side recycling.  You can download apps and track your own recycling and earn points.  There are educational opportunities, videos and activities that may be completed to earn additional points.  This has been helpful when trying to teach my children about the various environmental actions they can take to be more Eco-minded.  I want my kids to recycle.  But I, also, want them to take note that turning off the water and lights when not in use are important actions as well.  They enjoy the games, activities, as do I, and they definitely enjoy the benefits of the rewards it brings home.   For Dad's Bud last year, he needed to complete some environmental tasks for his Cub Scouts awards. It was great to sit down with him at the computer and take him through various videos and tutorials about Recycle Bank itself and ways we could care for our planet and environment and all from the comfort of our home.  No running the car across town to ask questions. 

Being able to see and more.........

Hmmm, driving home from Jenks, Oklahoma, I discovered home much of a MidWest girl I am.

 

 I like the wide open spaces. I love seeing the horizon that includes land and sky.

 

Not much for a landscape that includes lots of brick buildings, sidewalks and being underground. I have visited those places and was struck by how obstructed my view of God's creation was by all that man made.

 Some call me a city girl, because I am not much of a fan of dust and dirt and I am allergic to most things that pollinate.

In my fairy tail world missing dirt, dust and spiders, I am a Country Girl.

I like the views.

I enjoy gazing upon God's nightly paintings I the sky.

 

  But

I realized on the same drive I am the girl that likes daylight.

I don't like to drive in the dark.

 I don't like not being able to see the horizon.

  I like to know what is ahead.

I can say the same thing about Life.

I don't like the feeling that I am driving off into oblivion.

I don't like suprises. I want to know what is going to happen.

It is hard to trust the road is going to be there especially when speeding down the road at highway speeds or that nothing will jump out in front me.

Sometimes it is hard to trust that God really knows what He is doing.

Sometimes it is hard to know what it is God would have me to do.

 I fret and worry and pray God will get me home in one piece.

 It has gotten a little easier over the years, but not much. I just don't like it.

I don't like not being able to see what it is ahead.

And Each and Every Time 

I arrive, it is with a sigh of relief and a readiness to rest.

And a gladness that I am Home

I think Heaven is going to be at least a little bit, just like that.  

-

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Going Vertical !

 

Grandpa Mac retired from teaching this past spring, well sorta...

We received an email offering us some bookshelves.

I got kinda excited. 

Cause despite our best efforts, school always ends up in the dining room.

School gets scattered all over the table.

School time runs into meal time and well we end up with piles.

Piles everywhere.

Piles on the floor.

Piles in the living room.

Piles on the piano.

Piles on the fireplace ledge.

Well maybe this would be the fix...?? 

The Hubby was not to sure about more stuff in the house.

First he said, "No," then he paused and said, "Yes."

Then he asked where?

He was not too sure about my plan.

But after this many years of marriage, he is learning to let me try and fail....

and sometimes not fail!!!

This was definitely a win!!!

I am learning too.

As time has passed and lots of decorating fails, I am learning.

With his agreement to buy some pretties to pretty up my dining room.

I spent a whole weekend in between activities and such

sprucing up my dining room and going vertical.

 

 

 

 

 

Just Telling it Like it is....

So, I am not much for pretending to be perfect.
Far from Martha Stewart. 
My home will never be featured in Better Homes and Gardens unless it is a before shot or maybe in a what not to do article. 
But that is okay.
We laugh, we smile, we cry, we live and we embrace all that life is at the moment. 

Imagine all that bubbled into a home school day.
Gonna be one of those stories.
I wake up.  Kids are getting along.  (yes!  Maybe I should stay under the covers and let it last a little longer...and yet I get up. )  I shower.  Still harmony.  Kids are cleaning the kitchen (without being asked, oh yeah! ).  Some kids are working on school without being asked!  Hallelujah, the angels are singing.  We are communicating. Laundry is going. Lunch is in the crockpot.  I come out of bedroom after my shower and I smell yummy lunch cooking. 

This is an incredibly awesome day.

I sit down with The Man and we start school.  He is doing so well.  He is motivated.  He is reading with interest.

I pull out the flash cards.  Yes!  there is no crying, whining or begging to stop.  What an amazing day. 

The angels are singing. 

Oh yes.  Please come into my home and see all this.

The Man, doesn't have to sound out "THE" any more. 

Heaven is exploding with praises. 

We have been working on "THE" for weeks, months...can I say I was starting to raise my voice a little everytime I said THE....why couldn't the darling remember it?  But I hear the choir singing. 

Next sight word.... "SH*T"

The angels stop singing.

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!  SHE    SHE   SHE  SHE  SHE

Silence and then the older siblings start laughing and come running to see what the word was?
"WHERE did THAT come from SHE?" they ask.
Well The Man just likes to add "it" into any word he is sounding out when he chooses to be lazy.
We say, SHE SHE SHE SHE over and over.
I mix flash cards and it comes up again.  What does he say, but, SH*T again!
NO!
WE don't say THAT word, son.
TM:  What is SH*T?  in all innocence.
A Very BAD word for POOP.  DON'T SAY IT AGAIN YOUR MOUTH WILL BE WASHED OUT WITH SOAP!
Siblings STOP laughing.

Oh yeah, everyone who came into my home to hear the angels singing, they aren't anymore.  My 5 minutes in Happily Ever After has come crashing back into reality.  This is life, My Absolutely Crazy and Fantastically Humorous Life.   I secretly wonder how many first graders and kindergartners say colorful words in the classroom when reading out loud.

Sisters and Brothers, treasures from God

Big O Daddy O was trying to get Hockey Player to decide if he wanted to go to a Hockey Clinic the other day.
Kind of shocking that we were having trouble getting a response out of him.
He is thinker and we were trying not to push, but we were baffled. 
Little while later, he comes into the room where I am working and asks,
"Doesn't Little Princess get back around 6:30?"  Mental check and it is around 6:00. 
Nope. She gets back sometimes after 9:30.
"Oh, that's right. I do remember reading that somewhere."
Little Princess has been at an amusement park all day.
I am onery enough, I asked him, "You missing your sister."
HP: No
Mom: You missing your sister... yes there was serious teasing in my voice.
HP: No, it is just different with her gone all day.
WHOAAA this momma is enjoying this, cause she was gone to camp not so long ago and this wasn't the daily scenario!  Aha!  my boy actually likes his sister.
Hey, Big O Daddy O guess what!!!???!!
Of course BODO being sometimes more intuitive responds with, "So that is what the problem is?" 
Referring to why we can't get a response out of Hockey Player about the clinic.
So then Big o Daddy O gets in on it and asks him, "You miss your sister? "
HP: Yeah! said all quietly and Hockey Player like.
She is going to be gone for a while, you want to go play hockey?
No decision was made till later, they had to go to the rink to take care of Hockey business.  Later, I saw the debit transaction.  He did get on the ice. 
But I am ever so grateful for a glimpse into this kid's heart.
Willing to forgo hockey for his sister.  Willing to hear all about her adventures.  Something to hold on to and treasure.

This momma's dream is that her kids will be the bestest of friends forever.  It does my heart good to know they enjoy the company of one another.  Went to pick up Little Princess later that night and I let her in on a little secret....Your big brother missed you.  Her response, "That feels good to know. " 

My momma's heart is full.

What is it with Wednesdays?

Last week it was all about language.  This week, Daddy's Buddy asks me about Grandma when she died.  Did we put her in a box and she died or did we put her in the ground and she died?  I had to explain, she died in her sleep at HOME, then she went to a funeral home, they put her in a nice box called a casket and then put her in the ground.  AHHH, that is how it works. 
Hockey Player then asks, "Don't they drain all the blood out of the body and replace it with a preservative?"
A lot of oooohs and yucks. 
"Yes and sometimes  no," I replied shaking my head the whole time.
Little Princess pipes in with, "Unless they want to be cremated and turned into ashes."
Daddy's Buddy adds, "If they don't want to be in their dead body for the rest of their life."
Hysteria breaks out.
In their dead body for the rest of their life....
repeated over and over and loads of laughter
At this time, I am in the Pizza Hut drive through, at the window and can't stop laughing.  I have to explain to the lady in the window about last week and the current conversation.  She starts to laugh pretty good over being in the dead body for the rest of your life.  I mean seriously, how do the kids come up with these things?

But it doesn't stop there.  Flutter Nutter is giving me trouble with wearing his seat belt proper.  I decide drastic measures must be used.  I very calmly inform him, I do not want to buy a casket for Christmas.  I do not want to spend Christmas crying.  Would he please sit properly in the car?

He did for all of 5 minutes.  To which I sounded off and told him, "Fine, you die, I am not buying you a head stone.  I refuse to buy you a head stone for Christmas."  He shaped up and sat all good in his seat and seatbelt.  Who knew.  Having a head stone is important !

Then coming home from church Flutter Nutter is being all super silly and disobedient, AGAIN.
I am done and tired.  I am not letting them take you to the funeral home.  I don't want a Christmas funeral.  I will just leave you by the side of the road if you get killed.  Shaped up and sat like he was supposed to.  FLutter Nutter did respond with, "Cool."  Not exactly what I was looking to hear.  Hockey Player quickly responded with, "Not cool, cause then people would think you had been murdered."

Time to change the subject..."Let's go look at Christmas lights!"

Why it seems nothing ever gets done at home...

Lately, I am trying to keep from losing my hair.  Gray hair, no problem.  Hair loss could be a problem.
I look around my house and it seems to be in utter disarray. 
Then I have a day/night like I did today. 
Up early, got around for the day.  Took care of some paperwork.  Answered some school questions. 
Met realtor to review inspection list for house my dad is buying. 
Get ladder to inspect a roof.  We were having trouble believing the roof was okay.  Seller said the roof was replaced in 2009.  We happen to know there was softball size hail in the neighborhood in 2010. 
Big O Daddy O climbed up and all was well.  Matter of fact, he was greatly impressed.
Off to get a Pepsi, cause I am fading now. 
More paperwork, phone calls, count up popcorn sales and money for Cub Scouts, it is due tonight.
Whoops, missed lunch.  Time to teach English.  High school English and discuss MacBeth. 
The time quickly passes. 
Time for allergy shots, schedule a handful more and then post some packages at Dillons.
Home once again.  Just in time to start thinking of dinner. 
Fortunately, Fun Mom offers to prep dinner, while I lay down and work on Cub Scouts with Daddy's Buddy and Awana with Little Princess.
Little Princess is off to do her research now that I have her pointed in the right direction on the Awana website.
Daddy's Buddy is brushing teeth, lotioning hands and personal chores thanks to the Cub Scouts' section on caring for one's self.  Then, we discuss character trait: Faith. 
Close the eyes, but it is time to eat and I have to choose between snooze or eat.  Did I mention I missed lunch, and instead ate a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and a few handfuls of Cheez-its? 
Fun Mom has made chicken noodle soup from the basic of ingredients.  A great job she has done.  No canned soup for this girl. 
Time to leave:
First drop off Fun Mom for a play performance, featuring several home school friends. Then, a stop at the library cause it is only 2 or 3 blocks from Cub Scouts. 
Next, Daddy's Buddy has Cub Scouts and Little Princess and Flutter Nutter will hang out with us there.  Hockey Player will be picked up and taken to the rink by a teammate. 
Blink, blink, notes here, notes there, a little flag folding, wiggling, election, debating, and snacks Cub Scouts is over. 
Late heading out, a few phone calls while driving, pick up Hockey Player, pick up Fun Mom, and take the long way home around because the short way is closed due to construction!  Home sweet home and it is 9:45. 
10:30 and everyone but mom is in bed. 
Leftover Braum's and a bit more paperwork, computer work.  The day is done. 
But wait, just in case I can't remember why my house looks like it does in the morning, I will blog a reminder of the day(s) before. 

Been pondering....

This morning God woke me up.  Yep!  Really early too!  Couldn't go back to sleep. I tried, and that is how I know God woke me up, cause I was still really tired.  But I have been struggling with feeling overwhelmed.  Overwhelmed by what all needs to be done in a done and how it is going to be done.  So with my glass of water (Important point, cause there is no Pepsi in the house.  Kind of like coffee for the one who doesn't like coffee. Which is a good thing, cause if I had made a pot of coffee, then the whole house would have started to wake.  Did I say it was really early.).. 
So with my glass of water, I curled up to read my Bible and pray.  God didn't have a magic answer to how it was all going to get done.  He just told me to "just do it".  There was no, huh??  head scratching, trying to figure out what He meant.  Cause we have been down this road before.  One foot it front of the other, just go to the next thing when the first is done.  You see, I like to plan.  I homeschool.  I have a large family, to some at least...not like the Duggars.  I like to create beautiful schedules.  But guess what, my kids don't get it.  THEY JUST DON"T GET IT!!!  My husband doesn't either.  Not that he should.  Cause he is the head of the home, and I shouldn't be telling him what to do.  Maybe asking him about a possible honey do project...(a whole other topic..)
But really they just don't get it.  They don't have the same sense of accomplishment of a long list with tick marks next to each item.  They just do not get it ! Besides my beautifully created charts just aren't fun to apply.  Fun to create, but not to apply.  So I have been pondering on how to organize my year, months and days.  Not an easy task when I know my crew won't follow my schedule.  I have managed to learn life throws us curve balls on a regular basis.  So how Lord do we get it all done?
He reminds me, One foot in front of the other.
He didn't ask me to get it all done.  He asked me to seek HIM first, then to just go to the next thing, one foot in front of the other.   So I don't have all my plans figured out, but I have my mission/theme for the year. 
Seek the Lord first and then "Just do it!"

Did you know...

generic medicines are not always "the same" as their name brand counterparts.

Discussing meds with our clinician at a checkup we were told that generic drugs can vary plus or minus 20% in their makeup compared to the name brand.
That is a 40% difference!
Not a big deal, necessarily, with some medications, but...........
Needless to say, I was quite shocked.
We have been advised to start saving our prescription bottles. When they are completed, writing on them about how that "month" went while taking that bottle of medicine.

Formulas differ from company to company. (The pharmaceutical company is listed on the prescription label.) Pharmacies often choose the company offering the best deal at the time when they purchase their stock. So there is no guarantee a maintenace dosage will be the same from month to month!

No matter how many times doctors and pharmacists have tried to reassure me generic is no different than name brand, I have not agreed. I realize we are talking about milligrams and micrograms and 20% may not seem like a lot when calculated. But when the dosage is 12.5 milligrams, we are talking about super small dosages. Basically, a little bit goes a looooong way! In this case, a teeny tiny little bit goes a long way! 10 mg, is not enough and 15 mg is too much.
AIY!
And now it is all beginning to make more sense....

A new month...

The month of February was a tough one. It may be shorter in days, but it seemed like the longest month of the year. I clung to the verses Romans 5:3-5
And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, nowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, becuase the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
I even whined about God training me for a marathon, even though I don't like to run. But you need perseverance to finish the race. Faith and character is defined by how you respond to trouble. Hope comes from the faith we have in God's loving plan for our lives and this time on earth is so short when compared to eternity.
I am grateful the month is over and a new one starting, however, I am grateful for all I learned and gained during this season of testing.
I am grateful:
*answers to prayers
*for a strong minded child who will submit to discipline even though it is uncomfortable
*for a diagnosis of bi-polar, we now know what we struggle against and can seek treatment accordingly
*for insurance
*for friends who have walked the path of aging parents and can suggest a rehab hospital when we have only minutes to decide
*that it was only a puppy that bit Flutter Nutter, I originally thought it was an adult dog
*we knew the owners and were able to get the dog's shot history
*for short but sweet visits with out of town brothers
*for a phone call from my brother to let me know he is okay. I haven't heard from in at least 3 years
*my brother telling me he is praying and talking to God
*for a husband who will intervene and shield me from neighborhood drama
*for clinicians who are able to offer valuable insight into the world of generic medications (a whole other post)
*for homeschooling and the flexibility it gives us to embrace tough times like these as a family
*beautiful mid~winter days at the park to soak in the sunshine and take mental health days
*a wonderful Sunday School class of ladies who understand the need to allow the tears to flow and let me because to do so at home, distresses the children too much
*google calendars and all I am learning in how to streamline things at home and reduce paper clutter
*technology in general, so helpful in maintaining lines of communication when life gets harried and scary hard
*a husband who will read a book I am reading when he would rather be doing something else
*a therapist who is just amazingly big hearted and encouraging, who finds such joy and positive qualities in my child
*a therapist who gives hope, hope that my child's future can be different than what I have seen in others
*family therapy
*blue skies and bright sunny days like today
*excitement and anticipation of a family trip to St. Louis for hockey and fun

Does anyone have the time?

Big-O-Daddy-O and I are finding ourselves in one of those seasons of transitions.
And, well, I just don't feel that old or like I am suppose to be here already.
It doesn't seem to be time to be having some of those discussions.
And some of those transitions, I knew they were coming up, and yet, I feel blindsided.
There are some benefits though.
I prefer to sit there and ponder the benefits more than the other.
We recently went to the pumpkin patch. At least the kids and I did.
Big-O-Daddy-O had appointments to keep. I started to panic that morning in the shower. I was thinking through the day and what needed to be done. My relaxing shower left me shaken and in shock.
I was going to the pumpkin patch WITHOUT a stroller or wagon!
I have never done the pumpkin patch without one of those handy tools.
There's a place for drinks, picnic lunches and PUMPKINS!
With 5 kids that translates into 5 pumpkins!
But then there is the realization, the kids are older and good helpers, so we would be fine. BUT no stroller? ! ? When did that happen? I mean, I know when that happened. I sold them, gave them away, threw them away. Yes, we had quite the collection of them. But I had never identified the stroller with any family tradition, that is until then. Last year, BODO did the pumpkin patch. Fun Mom and I were in Ireland. See, they are getting bigger.
The trip went just fine. We even went on another field trip yesterday and it was fabulous. Just me and the kids and we had a blast. Those pics are coming. I know, I keep saying that. But we plan to sneak away as a family for a few days and well, I will probably get caught up on the fun stuff then. But back to me and the kids. That is another mile marker in our life. Since Flutter Nutter was born, I reached a threshold. I could NOT, would NOT consider going anywhere alone with ALL of them. There were a few times I did out of necessity. BUT it was too overwhelming to even discuss. But now, they are older and more independent, which can be a good thing. I am discovering the joy of exploring this world with my crew once again.
Then there is this other transition in life. BODO has declared he is having his mid-life crisis. Things happening in his body. New diagnosis. Health habits needing to be changed. But the latest has left me quite befuddled. And frankly I don't want to talk about it. He could RETIRE! What the? ? (For you grand folks reading, please, don't be offended) But retirement is for OLD people. You think about it when you are in your 60s, maybe 70s. NOT your mid (I am not late) 30s. I realize BODO is in the next decade here, but he isn't even mid-40s yet. I am not OLD. I rediscovering the joys of playing with my children and new discoveries. I don't want to talk about retirement.
Where did the time go? I would like to frankly know how this has happened in all of just a couple of minutes. Because I sure don't think this much time has passed. The 15 years we have lived in our home, doesn't even seem to be 15 years. Much less the 15 years we have been married. I can deal with the wrinkles. Mid afternoon naps and saggy arms but really, RETIREMENT? ? ? ?
So for my birthday.... Can we not talk about retirement until BODO's birthday! ? !

My Brain made me do it....

I haven't blogged much...
We got a dog.
We started school.
Big O Daddy O hurt his back (We learned yesterday he has a bulging disc in his lower back)
throw in 5 kids and the activity level of mine and there is not much left of this momma at the end of the day.
Nerves are shot. Sense of humor has become quiet concerning. I actually enjoy watching the dog get shocked from either his bark collar or the new electric fence meant to reinforce the command, "Stay".
I tore the back garden out so the fence people could lay the underground fencing/wire.
And Voila, set off a huge allergy flare. Eyes, nose, throat and skin....I am doing okay. Praying I won't need the steroids.
We celebrated one birthday and that post, well it will be coming before she turns 10. LOL. Getting ready to celebrate another.
Just learned hockey season will be starting up for us real quick. Tryouts start in a week. UGH, oooh, I meant YEAH !
Just to add a little more drama into explaining why I haven't been posting, the ghost "NOT ME" stepped in dog doo and tracked it all over the house. "NOT ME" also climbed onto one of the beds and wiped dog doo all over the mattress.
So off to the store to rent a carpet shampoo-er....
Just another month of craziness in my life...
However, I have not even started to explain the title of this post, so lets begin.
I am shampooing the carpet. Hockey Player is finally vaccuuming one of the rooms so I can shampoo it as well. Did I say finally... well the were kids asked, told, and told, and then mom blew. But it got done. Just as the vaccuum started there was a pop, the lights flashed and a slight blurble through the house. Then all was good. I didn't think anything of it.
That was until, Daddy's Buddy has anguish on his face and Big O Daddy O is asking what happened? Show me what happened? So I know something big has happened. I go immediately into denial, because I have plunged toilets this week, the dishwasher has broken, and the garbage disposal needs to be fixed as well...and did I mention BODO has a bulging disc that comes with a lot of back pain and he is pretty much useless in his role as Handy Man of the House right now. Because I am in denial, I keep shampooing. Because...I can do something about disgusting carpets.
Then the story comes tumbling out in BODO's hand lays a burned up, blackened contorted paper clip. 5 burned little fingers with blisters. Pointing at an outlet.... Tears...
"I won't do it again."
I dump the water. Pick up the phone and call the Nurse line. Nurse says, "Get him checked out at the hospital."
Off we go to the doctor's office, closer than the hospital and cheaper. Did I mention everything is falling apart and I just rented a shampoo-er. I am going to penny pinch if I can. He is not in life threatening distress yet. Have to explain he has been electrocuted, to my favorite nurse. The one I haven't seen in a year or so, she laughs and says, "I can see your life hasn't calmed down any." More phone calls. EKG? Protocols... I look at Daddy's Buddy and shake my head.
DB: "I don't think I am going to do that every day." (deadpanned, serious, straight faced. He's not joking."
ME: MY JAW DROPS, AND I LOOK AT HIM LIKE DUH, "HOW ABOUT NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, AGAIN!"
DB: looks at me like I have just crushed his feelings.
DB: I didn't want to do it.
ME: Where did you get the idea to do it?
DB: I didn't get the idea, my brain did. My brain told me to do it. If I didn't do it, my brain would blow up.
ME: Next time your brain tells you something, come tell me. I will talk to your brain.
DB: My brain can't be talked to.
ME: OH yes it can, I gave birth to that brain and I have super mom powers, I can talk to brains.
As we leave the doctor's office with 5 bandaids and a blown over stressed momma who needs some serious chocolate,
DB says, I think my brain got the idea from "Myth Busters"
ME: No more watching "Myth Busters!"

I love DB, I love his big head. Seriously, he has a big head. Doctor who delivered him even said so. I love his head. But his brain just might have to go.
And sooo, this is why my posts are far and few between these days. I need to go wind down some so I can sleep tonight and face yet another day tomorrow. Praying and Hoping BODO returns to normal health soon.

keyboards...extended warranties

Along with my computer trouble, I am alo having keyboard woes.
It *tarted with the "e" key. I couldn't get it to work all the time. And 'e' i* in a lot of words. Now I am having trouble with the s key...hence the * here and there. It i* really a pain when two of the most often used letters in the Engli*h alphabet fail you. I have found that I have to dig into my creativity to find new and different way* to communicate. A year ago my keyboard did thi* and thankfully the warranty granted me a new keyboard. It ha* not been quite a year, and the trouble has returned. Thankfully BODO took the offer of extended warranty. Time to make another call for a replacement, but al*o find out, what the problem might be. Hopefully fix the problem so it can not return!
I know a lot of people do not take advantage of extended warrantie*. At one time we were like that too. Now with 5 kiddos, life ju*t seems to be hard on THINGS around here. *o for big ticket items we don't want to get *uper angry about.... the warranty is a good option.... I offer yet another explanation for why I have not been blogging lately!

The storms of life....

It is easy to liken a tornado to one's home when the children walk through and leave a trail. Or the whole neighborhood ends up in the bedroom and every box, tote and drawer have to be dumped and investigated.
Hurricanes are what happens when a toddler/preschooler discovers how to turn the shower on and move the shower curtain around to maximize the experience of water in every which way.
I have discovered which natural disaster to compare my winters to...avalanches. How appropiate! There is the influx of STUFF! during the holidays. The weather is not suitable for garage sales, so the back corner of the basement begins to fill faster than rabbits or mice have babies. There's the extra shopping and doing and activities. I find myself wishing Passover, also included the pass-over of flu season and was celebrated during the winter. The laundry... it quadruples, due to all the extra layers needed to stay warm. Then there is the cabin fever. You encourage the natives to be quiet because with the mounds of laundry and garage sale stuff for spring, the slightest shockwave from rowdy children could cause a mountain to begin to topple. And then, it happens, your ever so comfortable home is full. Full of love, full of people and the cabin fever begins to affect dad. The roar of a dad is more than any home can take and the avalanche begins with the simple statement...."I've scheduled an appointment with a realtor to go look at a house." The mom, can't help, but duck and take cover cause here comes the avalanche..... He should have known better!

Whew, it is a relief!

I am worth more alive than dead!

Social Security says so!

Several months ago, dear husband got his annual letter from Social Security listing out benefits should he get to meet our heavenly Father before we do. He wouldn't show me his letter. He was afraid I might do something harsh. Social Security indicated he was worth more in Heaven than on Earth. I beg to disagree that on most days. **grin**

However, Social Security says I haven't worked enough. What do they know ? ? There should be a higher pay scale for homemakers and mothers in general...stay at home or working moms! Soo, I am not worth much dead. Good to know.

Social security benefits would pay for child care. But there wouldn't be much left for all the eating out I know my family would do or for the cleaning service they would need to help keep things running, or for the extra shopping that would need to be done in the stores since dear hubby won't have time to garage sale.

WOOHOO, what confidence I have in my husband, that he cherishes me and loves me. LOL ! !

This goes right along with the little revelation I had a year ago. I like to have dear hubby accompany me sometimes on errands. He likes to seek, grab and depart. I like to look, and poke along. He has got to be in the right mood to do that with me. For instance, no children with us! So one particular outting, he was about done and said he was going to go have a seat and wait. It dawned on me, I could take as long as I wanted cause he would not leave me. If he left me, he would have to go home by himself to take care of the kids ! I knew that would not happen. :)

Job security, I love it !!

Just so you know, I don't make a habit of driving him nuts with this little bit of knowledge. But I do no longer fret if the line in the store takes a little longer than I know he would like. Or if I happen to change my mind and need to get out of line and start all over again.